THE STORY SO FAR

     The Dinosorceror and his pals are on a quest to get all
these "Segments" of the "Device," a device that...well, no one
knows what it will do if it was ever assembled.  It's probably an
ultimate power thingy of some kind.  Their main opposition is the
Patriarch, who is also trying to get the Segments.  In the last
chapter, a "rogue" genie named Selsun gave three Segments,
collectively known as the Trion, to Bill Clinton, President of
the United States of Earth.  The Trion can make any fictitious
creation real, and Clinton used it to create perfect order on
Earth, claiming himself as Emperor.  He then used it to make the
virtual computer entity on-board the Turdis, the dolphin Darwin,
real, and Darwin died in a fiery crash that destroyed the Turdis
as well.  Emperor Clinton has given Dino a choice--join him or be
destroyed.  We now join our chapter, already in progress...


SB046: The Powers That Be

     Dino's eye ridges furrowed.  Here, Clinton was giving him
the option of bringing Godzilla to life, turning the videotape on
the ground between them into an immense source of yiffiness for
him.

     "Oh, come on, Clinton," Dino scolded.  "You really think I'm
that stupid that I'd throw away all the shit I've been through
just so I could get a cheap stomp?"

     "Actually, I do.  And I insist, Dinosorceror.  Your days of
'guarding the universe' are over.  From what Selsun and the
Patriarch have told me..."

     "Selsun?  The Patriarch?!?  They're behind this?" Jerhevon
shouted.

     "Keep your stegosaur quiet, Dinosorceror.  I don't want to
have to hurt him.  Now, as I was saying, the Patriarch has told
me all about your exploits.  How, slowly but surely, you've been
gathering all the Segments of the Device for him.  It's really
pretty funny when I think about it."

     "You're full of it!  Sure, the Patriarch has been there at
every goddamn turn whenever we get some segments, but we still
have more than he does," Dino retorted.

     Clinton tilted his head.  "Well, that's not really true
anymore, is it?  Look around you.  There are millions of armed
policemen around you.  This planet is mine, as the Patriarch has
decreed.  All I have to do is give him all of these Segments."

     Dino sighed.  "You know, he's right, guys.  Boy, we really
are screwed this time," he said softly to Red, Jerhevon,
Orelious, and the others standing behind him.  "Alright, Clinton. 
If we hand over these Segments, what guarantee do we have you
won't destroy us?"  Actually, Dino was just trying to keep
Clinton gabbing long enough to figure a way out.

     Clinton laughed heartily, tossing his regal imperial robe
over his shoulder.  "Now why would we disable the most effective
tool the Patriarch has for collecting Segments?  Just hand them
over, and you can go on your way."

     "In _what?_" Benjamin spat, holding Livingstone in his arms. 
"The Turdis just blew itself to kingdom come."

     The Emperor of the Earth shrugged.  "That's not my problem."

     "No...it's mine."

     They all turned to see a rather enraged blue dragon standing
to their collective side.

     "Holy shit!  It's--" Dino began.

     "Loophole.  Remember ME, Dinosorceror?  The one who
entrusted you with powers and responsibilities and stuff? 
Christ, you really screwed everything up.  Haven't you even
figured out who you are yet?"

     Dino, in no position to argue with a being of such
omnipotence, meekly hooted, "Well, I guess not."

     Clinton stuttered a bit, aghast, as Loophole continued. 
"You were given the Lens by another Dinosorceror, were you not?" 
Loophole didn't give anyone a chance to reply.  "You were meant
to take his place.  You were to guard the Lens, and keep it from
evil hands."

     "Well, I tried!" Dino whimpered a bit.  "I mean, sure...I
lost my Lens, but I've got this other one, and some other fiddly
Device Segments..."

     Loophole rolled his eyes in their sockets.  "Well...it's
true, you do get extra points for caretaking the responsibilities
of other Dinosorcerors, but you blew your own primary
responsibility."

     "Other...wait.  I thought there was only one Dinosorceror at
any given time, Loophole.  I thought I was the last hope of all
sentient life in the universe and all that heavy stuff."

     Loophole shook his head calmly.  "I just told you that in
the HOPES that you'd take it a little more seriously.  You think
one person can be entrusted with the universe?"

     "I do," another voice said, from the other side of everyone
assembled.  "And I am that person."

     The Patriarch slowly approached the group, Sa trailing not
far behind.

     "Oh, great," Dino mumbled to himself, and noticed that
Clinton was slowly backing away from everyone.  Stuck in a sticky
situation, Dino didn't have time or energy to deal with him.

     "I also think that you should give up your foolish dream of
this mythical peace you seek, Loophole.  The only peace that can
be achieved is through strong leadership," the Patriarch said
proudly and firmly.

     "Okay, twit boy...you wait your turn," Dino sneered to the
Patriarch.  "I'm about to find out some important stuff here. 
Put a sock in it."

     Loophole chuckled at the Patriarch's visible expression of
fury.  "Yes, Dino.  It's true, you're not alone.  Well, truth be
told, you're nearly alone now.  You see, the Patriarch has indeed
been manipulating you.  You know all the segments you acquired? 
They were each guarded by their own Dinosorceror, which the
Patriarch had managed to systematically dispatch shortly before
your contact with each.  He sees you as the least threatening
Dinosorceror of the Order, and he's using you to collect as many
Segments as he can."

     Dino thought for a moment, blinking a few times.

     "Well, CUT IT OUT!" Loophole scolded the cringing Dino. 
"Wake up for heaven's sake!  I can't be everywhere at once..."

     Loophole saw the Patriarch's eye ridges raise.

     "...er, I mean, I'm too busy to attend to all these fiddly
bits!  That's why there's the Order of Dinosorcerors!  You guys
are supposed to keep these Segments safe!  Geesh."

     Dino squinted a bit, gazing over in Clinton's direction
again.  He saw that he was already making a quick retreat with
his hordes of policemen and obviously holing up in the White
House.

     "You can't keep up you guard forever, Loophole," the
Patriarch sneered.  "You can't play your little Order game
forever.  Eventually, MY order will be the ONLY order."

     "Oh, and just for your information, Dino," Loophole said
obviously to the Dinosorceror although his gazed was fixed on the
Patriarch, "the self-proclaimed Patriarch here used to be one of
the Dinosorcerors of the Order.  He started to get delusions of
grandeur when he got the--"

     "THAT'S none of his concern, Loophole!  I suggest you make a
strategic withdrawal here whilst you can," the Patriarch shouted.

     "Oh, please.  You really do get quite delusional sometimes,"
Loophole chuckled a bit, extending a blue taloned clawhand which
held the three Segments of the Trion.  "It's time for more
redistributing and restructuring, methinks."

     Instantly, Dino noticed that the Segments he had arranged so
carefully on the necklace around his neck had vanished...all
except for the Dark Lens.  "Oh, what...punish me, too?" Dino
whined.

     Loophole gave Dino a flatmuzzled look.  "No, if I wanted to
do that, I'd take your Lens away.  And yes, that is YOUR Lens
now.  Try not to lose it doing something stupid this time, okay?" 
Loophole blinked and the Dark Lens disappeared from Dino's neck.
"Hey!  Wait, I thought you said..."

     "Oh, relax.  I just thought you'd find it easier to
use...and less likely to LOSE...if you had it on a ring rather
than on a necklace," Loophole sighed.  Dino looked at his right
clawhand and sighed a sigh of relief.

     The Patriarch just stood there on the edge of the group, as
if patiently waiting.

     "So...you're kind of...resetting stuff?" Dino asked.

     "Boy, you are bright, aren't you?" Loophole smiled.  "Yes,
I'm going to find new Dinosorcerors to guard all these Segments. 
Or is that Dinosorcerii?"  Loophole sighed.  "Anyway, I can't
keep doing this for you, Dino.  You've got to learn a little
sooner when you're being manipulated.  I can't keep bailing you
out like this."

     "Well, this is hardly a bail-out, is it?" Jerhevon asked
politely.  "I mean, you just took away most of the power we had. 
And we have no vessel, no...no anything."

     Loophole fiddled with the Trion crystals, making them rub
and spark against each other.  "Okay, okay.  Lemme use these
crystals to give you guys some more stuff."

     With no flash of light or sound, a Klingon Bird of Prey from
the original Star Trek series materialized on the ground.

     "There.  I hope you're happy, because I never was very
personally good at controlling the Trion crystals.  You could
wind up with a cartoon baby carriage if I tried again," Loophole
explained.

     Still, the Patriarch stood, as if waiting for something.

     "Well, that's not bad, I guess.  But what about Darwin?  You
had him programmed to be a link to you, I think, in
retrospect...he told us about where the Segments were, and...hey,
wait..." Jerhevon pondered.

     "Yes, that's right, Jerhevon.  Darwin was actually
controlled by the Patriarch.  That program was inserted after I
gave the Dinosorceror the...well, Turdis.  Of course, it wasn't
supposed to look like a port-a-potty, I hope you understand..."
Loophole began.

     "Yeah, yeah...we know the story," Red spoke up.  "But
wouldn't that be a good idea?  For us to have someone who knew
for real when Segments were threatened?"

     The Patriarch sighed, rolling his eyes, and looked at Sa.

     "That is a good idea.  Well, let's see what happens if I try
using this Trion thing one more time..." Loophole said, grasping
the crystals.

     Again, without any special effects, a nine foot tall
creature appeared before them.  It appeared to be some kind of
cross between a humanoid and a dolphin.  It's skin was a bluish
grey, and his hands and feet ended in stubby white-taloned claws. 
It wore only functional clothing, straps and belts that held
electronic gear and...ports.  Looking into the crimson eyes of
the creature, one could tell it was robotic by the lenses,
apertures, and twinkles within.

     "I am Watson," the creature said in a very very stern, very
very down-to-business voice.  "I am a direct link to other
Dinosorcerors around the universe.  I am also capable of
navigating the Apotheosis."  Without so much as a further, more
personal introduction, Watson walked up the gangplank into the
Klingon Bird of Prey.

     Dino raised his eyes.  "Well...hey, I'm liking this reset. 
That's a real funky name for a ship, though," he said to himself,
then glanced at the Patriarch.  "Say, how 'come you're taking
this so well, fruitcake?  Gee, if I were you, I'd be all fuming
and mad at what Loophole is doing."

     The Patriarch only glanced momentarily at the Dinosorceror,
as if that was dignifying the reply enough.  He then muttered
something to Sa over his shoulder.

     "So go on, get outta here, you crazy kids!  I'll go find new
guardians for these Segments, and Watson there will keep you
informed if there's anything funny going on in the balance of the
universe," Loophole stated, almost nervously.

     Dino stood puzzled for a moment, then motioned for everyone
to board the Apotheosis.  His gaze met Loophole's,
and...something passed between them.

     Dino looked at the Patriarch, whose gaze finally met
his...and the Patriarch smiled.

     "Come on, guys...get on board now," Dino urged them gently.

     The inside of the Apotheosis was appropriately dark and
dingy, with reddish light here and there.  As the "Dino Crew"
filtered in, they saw that Watson was sitting in the ship
commander's seat.

     "I take it there's no room for debate as to who should be
the cap-ee-tahn?" Red said to Watson, jokingly.

     Watson's bottle-nosed muzzle quickly pointed to Red.  With
emotionless eyes, he said, "I doubt you want to challenge my
position."

     Dino pushed Red aside slightly as he made his way onto the
bridge.  "Come on...er, Watson.  Get us the hell out of here,
fast."

     Watson nodded quickly at Dino, then pressed some controls.

     "Is something wrong, Dino?" Orelious' goat head asked. 
"What's going on out there?"

     "Let's just say...the Patriarch won't be happy."  With those
words, the warp drives on the Apotheosis engaged.

                              -   -   -

     "So...I see you brought the Scepter with you.  How clever of
you," Loophole said, his voice wavering a bit.

     "Why, yes, I did as a matter of fact, you aging fool.  I
always knew your sympathy would be your undoing.  You never will
accept that sympathy and compassion will never bring order to the
universe," the Patriarch said in a disappointed voice.

     "Well, it doesn't matter much now, does it?  Just finish me
off as you surely plan to do."

     The Patriarch didn't hesitate to grab the energized Scepter
from Sa.  "Just as soon as you put down the Segments," he said,
trembling to hold back the power the Scepter was ready to
unleash.

     Loophole swallowed, and chuckled.  "I can't do that." 
Before the Patriarch could say anything, Loophole clasped the
Trion crystals to the remaining Segments he held in his other
clawpalm.  In a whimpering fizzle, the Trion crystals dissolved
the Segments and themselves at the same time.

     The Patriarch was stunned.  His anger was too confused for
him to roar in satisfaction as he unleashed the power of the
Scepter upon Loophole.  Instead, he gave a disgusted grunt as
Loophole was disembodied and reduced to a puddle of gore over the
course of a few seconds.

     The Patriarch tossed the Scepter to the ground, and Sa
quickly skittered over to retrieve it.  "I can't believe he
pulled that noble self-sacrifice shit on me.  I can't _believe_
it.  By the universe, he was foolish."  Finally, the Patriarch's
rage caught up with him.  "HE DID THAT ON PURPOSE JUST TO DELAY
MY NEW ORDER BY A FEW MEASLY YEARS!" he shouted, storming off.

     Sa delicately retrieved the Scepter and caught up with the
Patriarch as they returned to his royal shuttle craft.  "But what
is to become of this Bill Clinton and the Earth?" she asked
politely.

     The Patriarch waved his hand to his side.  "It's immaterial
now.  Burn it."

                              -   -   -

     "All right, Dino...you've been silent for half an hour now. 
Where are we going?"

     Dino sighed, slumping into his chair.  "Well, we can't go
back.  That's all I know.  Loophole just wiped out the Segments
he took from us so that the Patriarch could never get them," he
sighed.  "And, if what Loophole guessed is right, the Earth is
probably destroyed now, just as a childish display of anger on
the Patriarch's part."

     "Wait," Benjamin interrupted.  "When did we miss this?"

     "Oh, when I glanced at him, he told me psychically that the
Patriarch had this Scepter that was more powerful than himself,
and that was he was about to use it on him.  And he said he
couldn't let the Patriarch get the Segments, so he...well, he had
to sacrifice himself.  Apparently, the Order of the Dinosorcerors
lacks a focal point now.  He may have given us Watson to act as a
guide, but...this is it, guys.  We have the Dark Lens, and we
have a duty to help the other remaining Dinosorcerors of the
universe...however many there may be left alive...keep these
Segments out of the Patriarch's hands."

     Everyone was silent for almost a minute, except for the
creaking of the latex covering on Watson's joints as he
manipulated controls, until Red observed, "Man, I'm gonna really
need that popcorn now."