Fire Lake Publishing proudly presents....... ____ _____ ____ ____ __ __ / __\ /__ __\ / \ / \ \ \ / / | |__ | | | /\ | | () | \ V / \__ \ | | | || | | _/ | | _ _ ___ ___ ___| | | | | \/ | | | \ | | _| |_| |_ /_ \ /_ | \____/ \_/ \____/ |_|\_\ |_| |_ _ _| / / | | ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ _| |_| |_ / / | | / \ / \ / \ / ___\ / \ |_ _ _| / /__ _| |_ | () | | /\ | | () | | |__ | |\ | |_| |_| |____| |_____| | < | || | | _/ | __| | || | | () | | \/ | | | \ | |___ | |/ | \____/ \____/ |_|\_\ \____/ \____/ ----- The Company Cometh ----- - OR - ----- May I see your ID? ----- Orelious turned rapidly toward Dinosorceror. "Company?!" Walking over to the radar display sie examined it carefully with all three heads. All three head's eyes bugged out and they chorused, "Oh @$#%^@$%^$!!!!" As the expletive settled in the air, everyone turned their eyes to the radar panel. Closing rapidly on the Turdis was a massive blop labeled simply "REALLY big warship. Dinosorceror suddenly came through with an uncharcteristic show of ingenuity. "Wait a minute! They can't get through the Turdis's shields. We're safe in here." Everyone appeared noticeably relieved by this, completely unprepared for the explosion that came next. The cause? Cera's troops beaming onto the Turdis through the break in their shields. The explosion was accompanied by a great number of lashing lights and sirens. Jenn was the first one to stand up. "What's going on?" The Turdis computer immediately replied, "WARNING! WARNING! INTRUDERS DETECTED ON DECKS 1, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, AND 17" "What about 9 and 15?", hooted Dinosorceror? "THOSE ARE NOT PRIME PLACES TO BEGIN AN INVASION." "D'oh!" Just then the door to the control area was blown off his hinges, and confusion once again reigned on the Turdis. Dinosorceror took advantage of the smoke to go hide under his bed. Meanwhile, colesaur storm troopers tramped on the bridge and quickly subdued the rest of the group. As they laid tied up on the floor, two Generals arrived. "How did you get in here?" growled the dark-side Jerhevon. "Quite easily," replied the one. "If you had taken the time to get your regular 50,000 parsec tune-ups, as mentioned in the Turdis Owner's Manual, you would have known that there is a hole in your shield." He gave an evil smile. "Look's like you failed inspection." Red eeped, "Who... who... are you?" "Ah, well, I am Cera's general, Hoo-mite. And this is General Yew-bee. Now, who might you be?" The crew nodded trying to remember the names. The general asked again. "I said, 'Who might you be?'" Again the crew nodded again, and Jenn piped up. "You already told us your names three times." The first general turned to the other. "Yew-bee, maybe you can get through to them." Yew-bee nodded in agreement and turned to the group. "I am Yew-bee...." "No, I am, you are", corrected Orelious. "Ahh, so you are Yew-ar" "I am I am what?" "You're Yew-ar." "Huh?" "You just said your name was Yew-ar." "No I didn't." "Yes, you did." Hoo-mite nodded in agreement. "Well, that's not my name." "It isn't?" "No, it's not." "Ah... So Knot, are you ready to surrender?" "Excuse me?" "Isn't your name Knot?" "No!! What kind of a stupid name is that?!" "Then why did you say your name was Knot?" "I DIDN'T! I SAID IT WASN'T YEW-AR!!" "Right, because it's Knot." "NOOO!!!!!" Orelious bellowed and then huffed a while, regaining hir composure. "Now lets get this straight. My name is not Knot, and it is not Yew-ar. Got that?" The two generals nodded with understanding. "Then who might you be?" Orelious completely broke down at this point, banging hir head against the wall with frustration. Thankfully, something came along to interrupt the pointless dialogue (Bonus points for anyone who knows where I got it from). A colesaur ran up. "Sir somthing on radar, your better look." The two generals walked over to the display. "Oh my, God!", shouted General Hoo-mite. "Yes?", asked Orelious. General Hoo-mite gave hir a strange look. "Oh sorry," said Orelious, blushing, "I thought you asked for me." The two generals looked at each other and decided it must be some inside joke. Yew-bee turned to the group. "You aren't all the original characrters are you? Some of your are replacements from an alternate reality." Jerhevon snorted. "No crap...." "You fools!! You can't mix characters from two different realities in one crew! It violates the conservation of variant field density!" "What does that mean?" asked Jenn confusedly. Pointing to the window, General Hoo-mite's only reply was, "That!" Everyone turned to see a massive space-time distortion (as required in the Star Trek: The Next Generation plot guidelines) flying toward the Turdis and command ship. As it touched the command ship, it dissapeared in a flash of white, completely vaporizing. The Turdis was consummed a few seconds later. *** Dinosorceror awoke in the middle of a quite forest. Birds chirped and flitted about through the sunbeams leaking through chinks in the thick canopy. Other than that he seemed completely alone. "Where am I?" *** "What the?" was all the dark-side Jehevron could think as he looked about. He seemed to be on vast savannah, but like none he had ever seen. It look almost upside down, because the grass was bright blue, and the sky a deep rich green. *** "Well, this is just peachy." Jenn looked over hir shoulder at Red, who looked just as discommfitted. Somehow they had been joined into a single body with two heads. Unfortunately, the body hadn't decided which head was in charge, which made things rather troublesome as it kept trying to do two things at once. *** Livingston sniffed around looking for a way out of where he was. Eventually he met Ben who was stumbling around as well. "Hiya, boy!" he cried and greeted the dog. Looking around through the pitch black, the two wondered where they were and how they could turn the lights on. *** X, Jerhevron, and the dark-siders followed the Turdis's trail through space then suddenly, it just ended. "Where did the Tudris go?" barked X. No one knew the answer. *** Orelious woke up in an area filled with swirling clouds of mist. Looking around, sie saw a hermaphrodite dragon looking over hir. The dragon was black with a white underbelly and mane, and bipedal. Strapped to hir back was a large glowing sword. "Hello there!", sie called in a feminie voice. "It's so nice to see someone else here," sie said, speaking as a male now. Sie helped Orelious to hir feet and dusted hir off. "Now, who might you be?" "Oh no! Not that again! ARGGGGGGGGGGGH!" And with that the chimera bolted off into the mist until she was soon lost from sight. "My, what an unusual creature." Stormfront Swordbearer shook hir head silently and then headed off into the mists after the chimera. -- *************************************************************************** * ** Brought to you by: * * "Is that it? Am I just another ** * * yahoo in the end!?" ** S C H E L L C O . * * ** Since 1977, the proud producer * * -- Lemuel Gulliver ** of the finest me on earth. * * Gulliver's Travels ** * * ** Contact at: mss175@psu.edu * *************************************************************************** Fire Lake WWW Server Homepage: http://mss175.rh.psu.edu/firelake.html Fire Lake's Lion King Page: http://mss175.rh.psu.edu/lionking/lionking.html